How many of you think that you adjust alot with people?? Or like really put up an effort to keep the relation alive? How often do we say things like “I am tired of compromising” , “when will you change?”, “why can’t you be understanding?” , “when will you start acting responsible?” And I can go on! Our complaint box seems to be overflowing sometimes. These relationships are a real headache. But I ponder often upon the irony of relationships. I mean these are meant to make us happy, see the good in life but lately these have been more of a burden than stress busters and relievers! Really tired of the havoc these have created in my life I paused again and analysed. Most of the time the thing that made me unhappy was the way the other person behaved or a habit she/he had. I mean the problem is with THEM not me! But then again I have read quotes like ” people never change ” and similar stuff. I suddenly realised that it has always been like this. No amount of bickering or complaining changes anyone. And the more you tell others how “not so good” they are, the more irritating they become. In a way maybe it is right also! Who likes to be rejected? If someone comes and tells me a hundred reasons why I am not good, I would just be hating that person. Similar to that, when we reject someone it gives them no reason to change for us. Why should they? If I cannot appreciate anything good in them, then why do they need to put up an effort to change? Just so that I can accept them?? Isn’t this so funny?? We are so busy rejecting people that we don’t even realise that we are giving every reason for the relationship to not workout. But yes if I go out of the league and instead of rejecting I start accepting them, maybe they will find a reason to work upon themselves.
So first thing, ACCEPTANCE , deep understanding and seeing their point of view may help, because everyone is right according to their own perspective. Even a criminal has a justification for what he does.
Secondly, we know we have to interact with the same set of people for a long time. We have only two options at our disposal, either I don’t accept them and keep crying about the situation and one day just give up, or I accept them entirely and leave room for some improvement! And even in the second case if they don’t change I wouldn’t be bothered because I already accepted them!
Third thing, what is the use if the other person changes? They we will one day just walk off our life, what will there changing do to us? We only became all the more dependent on people changing for my happiness and that won’t happen every time!
So what I realised was that there are hundreds of people who are rejecting hundreds of others, but somewhere what we all need is people who accept! Let’s start the thing with us. There maybe many who are waiting for my acceptance. Let’s accept every person that we meet and leave behind things like judgement, criticism and gossiping. There is a lot to learn from people around us. Let’s learn the good and let go off the bad! ACCEPTANCE has a lot of positive attached with it. When we send the person next to us an energy of acceptance we send them this gift of positivity. The law of karma will bring this back to us. So for the future good lets today pledge to start the cycle of good wishes and acceptance. ☺
I smiled at him despite his mistake,
Ignored the past full of fake,
He smiled again and turned his life,
Cutting the bad with a powerful knife!
A changed being now awaits me,
Beyond imperfections I can see.
The smile was powerful indeed,
Washing away the selfish greed!
Happier are the smiles which now we share,
Sprinkled with a sparkling flair.
The touch worked its magic again,
Washing away a lifetime bane!
I am happy that I smiled that day,
And left room for the chance that lay!!